Friday, 1 March 2013

New Country n' Western

So I shared with you some of the old stuff in my last post. Here's some new stuff.

Jo Dee Messina - My Give a Damn's Busted

Whoop. :)

Thomas Rhett - Beer With Jesus

What a considerate young man... "I'd try to pick a place that ain't too crowded / Or gladly go wherever he wants to go" ... "You can bet I'd order up a couple tall ones / Tell the waitress put ‘em on my tab." He wouldn't be tempted to order a glass of water and... y'know... I suppose you wouldn't want to offend the son of god by asking him to show you a miracle, would you. Apparently REAL MEN don't drink wine these days anyway, and Jesus tends to get sulky when you ask him to prove himself. Things could get awkward. He might even look at his watch and go, "actually, sorry, I've got to run. Can't hang around here all day." (Badum-ching.)

Deana Carter - Did I Shave My Legs For This?

Ain't got nothing to say about that. Pretty much your standard "he sits on the couch and drinks beer all the time" story... but I like the video and the chorus.

Now for the truly horrible ones. American country music seems to have gotten a whole lot worse in the "smug bastard" department.

I was looking for a song called "Guns". There's one somewhere. But first, there's this guy singing about his gun-buying addiction to the tune of "I Will Survive."

? - The Gun Addict Song

I'm scared. Very scared. For more of him, here's a song about being a militant nutjob who carries survival equipment everywhere he goes, to the tune of "Hand In My Pocket." "You're a sheep and I hope that you are happy." Weee...

Though I guess they're not really country, these songs. Unlike this one:

Justin Moore - Guns

Yes, there it is. Complete with women in bikinis, racism, and xenophobic stupidity. Awesoooome. Want more? Here's "This is NRA Country." Clearly populated with a bunch of aspiring actors who they paid to stand in front of a camera.

Kenny Chesney - She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy

Bleah. It could have been funny, but he's such a creep.

I'll come Back As Another Woman

Not entirely sure if this song is about reincarnation, disguise, or maybe some kind of shape-changing sorcery.

So there you have it. I'm gonna go wash my mind of the memory of Kenny Chesney's red pulsating neck.

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